Saturday, March 26, 2005

"Who's My Daddy?"

Yesterday, Guy found a small note that was rolled up inside a little box. To him it looked like a treasure map. He got excited and called out, "Treasure!" He held on to it for a while and he picked it up again today.

I just now read the note again. It says:

"TRIXIE

Thank you for being a Wonderful, Loving, Caring, Joyful, Passionate, Spiritual, Truthful, Accountable, Worthy, Giving, Compassionate, BEAUTIFUL, Mother and Understanding, Friend.

Love, (Stanley) XOXO"

What might be surprising is that it came from a small package that my ex-husband sent to us over a year ago. We were already separated for about a year. The box also included a couple of pocket charms. For me, he choose the Earth Goddess. The card that came with it read, "The Earth Goddess is the Mother who nurtures our soul, giving us strength to reach our goals.

The one for Guy was a Wolf- "Wolves of the forest run free, full of spirit and energy. Let them inspire you and me with courage to be all we can be."

I am just grateful that I don't have a hateful relationship with Guy's father. We aren't buddy buddy, but we get along fine.

I know he is going to want to have visits with Guy once we move back to Utah. He hasn't paid a dime of child support. I know he doesn't make much money. Some people feel that a father doesn't deserve to see his child/children unless he is paying child support. I understand the principle of it, but I try not to get caught up over the money aspect of it. If I thought my child was being abused or neglected in his care, then I feel like that would be a good reason to forbid him to see my son, but otherwise I don't see any harm.

I am concerned about when he gets older, what kind of an influence he might have on him. His father doesn't go to church or live by the standards anymore. I expect this will be something I will have to face and prepare him/myself for eventually. In the mean time, I think it will be good for Guy to get some one-on-one time with another male adult.

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