Wednesday, June 22, 2005

More Than Words

I went out again last night with, the same guy I went Mexican Dancing with. I think I'll name him Chino. We were originally going to go to the lake with Guy, but the weather turned bad, so we went do dinner, just us two. And where did we go, but to an Oriental Buffett.

I had been there before, too with my ex-husband and his mother. Guy was with us then and he had his first taste of solid food. My mother in law was getting a kick out of feeding him tapioca pudding.

Chino ate 8 muscles from the buffett!..among other things. I'm not suggesting that he at too much food, but that seemed like a lot of empty shells on his plate. Is that normal? I kind of suspect not. Isn't it said that they enhance one's sex drive?....Great, as if he needs it.

I began prying to find out more about what happened with his marriage. I asked him how long he has been divorced and he explains that it is six months into the divorce, ie: he is still legally married. Then I ask him why it didn't work out between them. He goes on about how when there is no love, any problem is a big problem. I then asked if he is saying he didn't love her. He proceeded to tell me how when he got off of his mission, his goal was to get married, so he made a list of possible girls that he knew and selected from them. He regrets his decision and he said that he feels like his heart still belonged to some other girl who wasn't a member.

Twelve years they were married. I asked him if he didn't grow to love his wife. He claims that he felt an obligation for her and his children, but that it wasn't enough.

I was not impressed. That obligation is what should have kept him married to his wife. He failed to mention that his divorce is not yet final. That is an issue with me. I did not even go on any dates before I got those papers back from the judge, even if my ex was going around shackin up with other women.

I didn't want to let it ruin the evening, so I moved on to something else. I suggested we go to a movie after dinner. He mentioned that the CD that he coppied for me about ebay sales was back at his place. So he wanted to give that to me and we could watch a movie there.

He just purchased The Passion, which I had not seen, so we watched that. Let me just say, that it is not a good make out movie. He was putting the moves on me the whole time. It was easy for me to resist him, especially with that movie on. I had to let him know a few times what my boundaries were, but he kept coming back and trying again.

I noticed that he wasn't wearing garments. I aske him why. He skirted around the issue, and said he would tell me later. I began to be suspicious about what else he wasn't telling me. I started questioning him. I asked him if he had an affiar, or if he has been intimate with other women since he and his wife split up. He dodged them like a cannon ball.

I got up and told him I needed to go. He wanted to talk it over, and I told him I feel like there is something he is not telling me and he is not respecting me. He figured he was different than other guys because he wants to work on having a serious relationship with me. I told it wouldn't matter if he got down on his knee and put a ring on my finger, the limits would still apply. I think he finally got it.

I finally left, and I will not be seeing him again. I felt misunderstood and annoyed. I was wishing I could see Raymond to cry on his shoulder or something. I messaged him to find out if he was free. Before he reponded, I had already made up my mind that I would not see him. He said he had just been on a date, but it was over now. I told him, me too! I explained that I was in SL and that I thought about stopping by, but I changed my mind. He said, "Damn, if I was in SL, I would say yes, but I am in Ogden."

It was enough to know that he would have invited me. Why is it that I can't get him out of my mind? I think about him when I am out with other guys. I love that he respects me and is sensitive to my feelings. I don't even have to say anything and he will sense that something is wrong.

1 comment:

Sariah said...

Eeeks, tough night! As I was reading, I kept thinking, 'Please do not go out with this guy again!'

I'm glad that you told him how it is too! Even if he doesn't change, he needed to hear it.

It's always good to trust your instincts. Hang in there!